i was driving my parents' van yesterday afternoon and skidded on ice and ran into a bank on the side of the road. the van was barely damaged, and i escaped with only a bruised knee, but the van nearly flipped. and as all of the skidding and swerving took place, i did not see my life flash before my eyes. i did not find jesus. instead, i just concentrated on the stream of profanity issuing effortlessly from my mouth.